wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
