Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
