You don't have asthma, your pregnant
I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
and you said cock pushups were impossible
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Randomize