Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Randomize
