last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Randomize
