He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Randomize