Having a random hookup so left but love u
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
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