Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
how drunk are you?
Several
Randomize
