the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize
