I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
My ass is underappreciated
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
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