if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Randomize
