Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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