I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Randomize
