Her vagina should come with caution tape.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.