How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize