Don't you send me to vm
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize
