Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
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You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
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He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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