i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
