You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
