What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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