The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
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