Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
