I CAN MOONWALK!
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Randomize
