We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
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