check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Randomize
