You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
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