We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
I have fence marks all over my body
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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