I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
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