Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
