just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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