found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Randomize
