so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Randomize
