How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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