we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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