He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
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