He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
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