I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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