Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
