We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize