Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
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