We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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