Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
