I've blown a few things in my day
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Randomize
