I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Randomize
