I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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