who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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