I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
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