I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Randomize