Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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