No, drunk sperm still make babies.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize