She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
