I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Randomize
