This girl is more easily done than said...
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize
